Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Well blog followers... All four of ya... Its Faustnaught day here for all you Pennsylvania Dutch pretzel eaters. Not to be confused with "FastNuts" day which is something TOTALLY different and will be described in a later post. Apparently faustnaught is the old german word for doughnuts and comes from a tradition where all these "sinful" ingredients like sugar and whatnot would be used up before Lent when these things were no long supposed to be consumed. I don't get that kinda thing. You think God's gonna fault me for enjoying all the wonderful things he (she/it) has provided including sugar, creme, butter, sweet cheeba, fine booze and delicious sins of the flesh? I sure as hell hope not


Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Back on the Bloghorse

So a friend of mine asked me for a link to my blog yesterday and I gave it to him, and was immediately embarassed by the fact that I have not written anything on here in about a month and a half. Thats not very good for business so I suppose its about time I get back on this blog thing. In fact... I kinda miss it...

So I was gonna do a post on home-made sex toys and may still do that, but I am not at my home computer and I don't have any of the links saved anywhere handy.
Instead I think I will take this opportunity to announce that I think I am going to (possibly) run for Official Mayor of West Chester (maybe). It's well known that I've been the Unofficial Mayor of this fair town for quite some time now. I think its time to make it official. Move over Dick Yoder, there's a new sheriff in town. (by sheriff I mean mayor of course)

As most of you know already, I am one of the most regionally famous people in the West Chester area due to countless years (23) of being the coolest guy I know in town. (that's a fact people) Now I've been living in the borough for a little over two years and I think my transformation into local borough rat has gone quite nicely... Everyday I walk to work and as I claw my way past the mangled cobblestones that litter my sidewalk and make it out to High Street, I go past several shops where every morning and every evening I gave a wave and a "how do you do" to various shopkeeps and they return the favor, often greeting me by name. Then as the evening rolls around I'll go out to eat or go to a local watering hole (water=sweet sweet booze) and nine times out of ten the bartender will either know my name and what I want before I get there, or at least know what I want and be able to list at least three of my greatest achievements in their eyes.

Now I know what you're thinking... you're thinking that doesn't mean you are famous, it just means you drink too much! Well all I have to say to that is NA UHHHH! Its not even only in drinking establishments that I assume my reputation for arrogant presumption precedes me. Yesterday I was in line at the INCREDIBLE paradise of food which is Carlino's Italian Market, located of course, on Market Street when I was informed that my credit card was declined... 'HA!' I laughed... I can't believe I have too much money for the card to even contain, but I must have broken its puny card brain with all the 0's in my account. Turns out my bank was kind enough to cancel that card due to a fraud threat and forgot to notify me that they would be taking this action. So then (true story) the girl working the register, obviously embarassed that she has to charge me in the first place, offers to buy my lunch for me. When I question her about her generosity she says " Oh ______ you're in here all the time, just pay me back whenever". Thats power people... people power.